entrances and endings

I've been away from this blog for a while, weighed down with busy.  Unable to write about recent events, or even to think clearly, I've felt pent up lately.  There's too much going on, swirling around me, as though I'm on a carousel watching the carnival booths flash by. Cotton candy, funnel cake, multi-colored lollipops.  Caramel apples in cellophane wrappers that catch the odd glance of sunlight.

Of course, faithful readers, the reason for this is obvious: New York Fashion Week.  (Oh, I know, there's the whole Annie's-lovah-is-dead-what-will-happen-to-her-now? thing, but I'll let her finish that story.)  I've been in galleries and tents for days, photographing shows.  The tents, the lights, the clothes, the celebrity sightings, it's all too much.  I need to make a list.  My favorite moments.

• Standing next to a photographer from Vogue, and hearing the latest Conde Nast rumors. (Apparently, Andre Leon Talley is actually a woman.  S/he dated Anna Wintour in college.)
• Bungalow 8 on Wednesday night. Lindsay Lohan told me she loved my hair.
• Overhearing Kirsten Dunst say that Marc Jacobs was her favorite show so far. (It was my favorite show too, which just proves that Kiki and I have the same impeccable taste.)
• The crush of people everywhere, sweating and rubbing together, crowding entrances, it feels like a club or a gang bang.
• Meeting Donna Karan. I love her clothes; she loves my hair. We're probably going to be best friends.
• The Zac Posen afterparty at SoHo Grand last night. I kissed three Posen look-alikes, who all told me they loved my hair. They all turned out to be gay.  Why is this the story of my phucking life? Why is my fabulous hair wasted on men who could fit into my Habituals?

I've just come home from the Boy George show (where Janice Dickinson - world's first supermodel! - told me she loved my hair).  My Blahniks gave me blisters. "Go ahead, baby, lick them. Yeah, that feels gooood."  My sweet Calvin, curled around my ankles, a cuff bracelet of fur and saliva, healing tongue working over my wounds.  Maybe this is the story of my life, despite the flashbulb glamour and gay endings.  This could be it, just me and my dog and my Blisterniks, and that would be okay.  I know that won't be it, though, the way I know when a celebrity is in earshot. I'll find the man I want, the kind with safe arms and salt-streaks in his hair. But right now, alone in my loft apartment, I feel strangely satisfied, as if someone just crammed my rosebud and phucked me til it hurt.

Comments

[3rd Times a Charm ( 3T )]

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!This is utterly.....HILARIOUS!!
That's it. Just too funny for words.

3T

[Noisette]

"weighed down with busy." Brilliance. Genius.
Nothing like a little dog saliva to cure what ails. (I'm glad you spotted that in certain other posts- I thought that crossed the line from maudlin to disgusting).

PS- I LUUUUUVE your hair.

[Subtext Whore]

And the linear gay curve is so appropriate, given today's post over at the other side. ;)

[industrywhore]

i want to phuck calvin. oh god. didnt mean to type that out loud.

[mimi f.]

"I feel strangely satisfied, as if someone just crammed my rosebud and phucked me til it hurt."

If you can get the dog to perform oral, I'm sure it's possible to train it for other uses too sweetie.

Your fan

mimix

[Straight Up and Jappy]

LMAO doesn't do this post justice - you're hysterical. If someone saw your blog and SK's side by side, they wouldn't be able to tell who was parodying whom.

So much talent, and great hair, too? Some girls have all the luck.

[Toby]

Oh my god, I literally LOL'd after reading the last sentence.

[La Putain du Subtext]

Thanks to Anneeee and Stepheeee, the line between satire and reality is thinner than ever. Obviously I think they should sue Stan Hope...[cough]...Steph Klein for copying their ideas. ;-)

[Lizzie]

You're right, you're not destined for a life of just you and your dog and your blisterniks. Not with the beautiful head of hair you have. No, I envision plenty more gay Zac Posen-look-alike kisses in your future. And you and Donna Karen are totally going to be best friends.

[Midwest]

I'm sure Judith Regan is spitting botox that she didn't sign you two first. Not only can you write well, but you can also write badly well.
Midwest
www.kissnblog.com

[amy]

I can't breathe. BTW - I love your hair!

[He's Dead, Jim!]

I applaud your bravery in the face of danger. Not every city girl would be so resourceful. I am reminded of the economy of our Native Americans, who would make use of every part of the Buffalo.

Steph and Annee, you ought to make an urban "Dances With Wolves." Your connections in the industry would provide succor. After all, you did invent the epic drama...
~HDJ

[Pit Viper]

Once again, an anal allusion results in a two hour wait at Hamburger Mary's. Why can't you talk about your boobs and vagina every now and then?
Still doing the yogurt diet?

[Sashay Chantay]

Oh God! You're dead on brilliant, love!

And that phucking hair!!!

[Natasha]

I love your blog, it's so refreshing and simply fabulous.

;)

[piupiu]

its london fashion week.

does my bomb look big in this?

[stretch_td]

Fashion week was disappointing... but that hair! Where did you have it done, girl. Details please. Dont leave us hanging.

[TheGirlWho]

Pot. Kettle. Black.

[lonesome]

Hey,
Hope your writing an entry soon!

[Evangelia]

hahaha Love this post about your hair! You must have some really nice hair!!

[lefty_grrrl]

Are you guys still weighed down with busy?

[Wondering...]

Is the Stephanie protection team after you two as well? Have you received an invite to meet with them yet? Are they sending point by point emails to you?
Just wondering.

[allie]

i needed a bit of humor to shake me out of my friday funk, so i headed straight for the ole greek tragedy. i read this:

***
And then I share with them, in the back of a taxicab, my latest bedroom vocals.

“Where do you come up with this stuff?” Even the cab driver turns his head when I say the words “fill me.”

That’s the thing. You don’t invent it; you genuinely feel it.
****

i'm pretty sure she "came up with that stuff" when she was watching the movie ELECTION.

maybe we should start another lawsuit. that would be fun.

[ginevra]

a club or a gang bang? does that mean I have to choose?

[edina]

I think SK will focus les son TOT as in the latest pics, PHIL looks super bored...maybe he is tired of life being one big photo op....